{"id":12,"date":"2006-03-07T09:59:55","date_gmt":"2006-03-07T09:59:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.pinkhairedgirl.net\/?p=12"},"modified":"2006-03-07T09:59:55","modified_gmt":"2006-03-07T09:59:55","slug":"total-exposure","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/?p=12","title":{"rendered":"total exposure"},"content":{"rendered":"

Yesterday I did something that was a
\nstretch in my character and just the way I am wired… and today I am doing
\nsomething similar just by telling you about it.<\/p>\n

Let’s be real for a second, shall we?<\/p>\n

<\/a>\"Crystal_and_her_slide2_1\"<\/a>
\nYou
\nmight know my fears in driving. Ok… so… honestly… I don\u2019t drive. I am in
\ntherapy due to my anxiety over it in fact. It has been a struggle ever since I
\nwas little and has escalated into my adulthood. Some of it is just as simple as
\na localized panic disorder and some of it is actually posttraumatic stress from
\na wreck I experience at age 18. I\u2019ve always been embarrassed by this paralysis
\nand it is not something I share with many. It takes trust to share this about
\nmyself. Trust that I won\u2019t be judged or really thought of as weak. Recently
\nthrough the therapy I am seeking and the medication I\u2019ve recently been put on I
\nthink it is and will become easier to talk about. And gradually I will get back
\nbehind the wheel (of a real car \u2013 in the real world).  <\/p>\n

Ok… now that
\nI’ve exposed myself for what I really am… <\/p>\n

Yesterday
\nduring a youth staff team-building exercise we went to PowerPlay. Scott had
\nrented out the Go-Carts for an hour for us to use for the teambuilding (how
\nthis is part of my job I can’t even tell you). Go-Carts have never really been
\na problem for me – however – blindfolded is a different story all together. The
\nobject was to have one person (blindfolded) driving on the windy course and that
\nperson has a partner on a walkie-talkie telling them where to go and what to
\ndo. Being their eyes. Having to trust them that they would get you through it.<\/p>\n

This made me sick to my core.<\/em> <\/p>\n

\"Crystal_and_her_teetertotter_1\"<\/a>
\nThe thought of having no control over a situation – especially one in which it
\nmeant me having to drive – almost threw me into a fit. I was not even going to
\npretend to do it. For whatever reason I decided to give it a go. I picked
\nGretchen as my partner. I think it was because Gretchen is a mom and she
\nwouldn\u2019t let anything happen to me. I trusted her to protect me. <\/p>\n

I know it was an exercise in
\ntrusting my teammates and may sound kinda small… but or real\u2026 this was the
\nmost stretching exercise I have had to do that forced me to face my fears. My
\ntherapist will be so glad\u2026 haha\u2026 and really I am proud of myself for doing it.
<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Yesterday I did something that was a stretch in my character and just the way I am wired… and today I am doing something similar just by telling you about it. Let’s be real for a second, shall we? You might know my fears in driving. Ok… so… honestly… I don\u2019t drive. I am in… Continue reading total exposure<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[45],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal-growth","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=12"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=12"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=12"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherecovery.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=12"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}