one hilariously weird dream

WARNING: You are about to enter my subconscious mind. Please do not think differently of me after reading this. If you are afraid you will judge me based on what my subconscious world holds within then I encourage you to simply click the "comments" link, leave some love and be on your merry way. You have been warned. haha…

I had one hilariously weird dream last night. It is the kind of dream about people from your real life, but for the sake of the true individuals, I am going to hide their identities. For the main 2 characters, lets call them, "Seth" and "Sally". I will play myself in the reenactment for I am not ashamed. :)

I must tell you that it is much funnier if I actually tell you in person and you know who the real people are. I have to be careful in how I write this dream because at one point it could be translated as "dirty" – but it was NOT, I repeat, NOT a dirty dream. Just hilariously weird. So without further adieu… the dream…

The dream began like any normal dream – normal. I was going on a weekend retreat with the entire staff. I have actually never done this, but I hear that in the past they used to do this. I am excited. I was all ready for a spiritual retreat with the staff and friends I work with every day.

We arrived late and decided it was "lights out" and we would start the retreat bright and early. "Pastor Jones" wanted to make sure everyone got a good night sleep. We got our room assignments. I was roomed with Sally and Seth. Yes, Seth. Apparently on church staff retreats we have co-ed rooms! (this doesn’t actually ever happen). In the dream it seemed like I was the only person who saw this as a problem, so I went along with it. It is just one night and I was not intimidated by Seth. Whatever.

There are 2 beds. One queen and One twin. Before I could call the twin bed, Seth calls the queen bed. A queen bed for one guy? How selfish I thought. Before I could say so, Sally chimes in and says, "I’ll share with you, Crystal you can have the twin for yourself" and she jumps in with Seth. I am totally flabbergasted at this point… not to mention completely uncomfortable. They’re both married… and not to EACH OTHER!

I just got into the twin (still wearing my jeans and sweatshirt) and turned my back from them. Praying that morning would come soon.

If you can believe it – just NOW is when the dream gets really weird (but hilarious)

I then hear Sally say, "I just love having the vibrations of another person in bed with me. It is weird not having my husband here."

"Vibrations?" – Seth asks.

"Well you know, just the movement of someone next you, you know what I am talking about – you’re married" – Sally says.

Seth then does the funniest thing (weird in the dream, but hilarious now), "you mean like this? VVVVVVVVVVMMMMMMMMMMMMMVVVVVVVVVVVVVVMMMMMMMMMM…" (seriously this sounded like a blender or something… if you’ve seen the FRIENDS episode when Joey is pretending the light switch made him turn on and he makes that humming noise… that is what it sounded like.)

And Seth just kept doing it… over and over…

Then I woke up.

Told you it was hilariously weird. And completely backwards from what would actually happen in real life. But I guess that is how most dreams are. (looking back I don’t know why Sally and I just had Seth take the twin so Sally and I could share the queen – but that is logical "awake" thinking).

If you are on staff with me – I am curious if you can guess who Sally & Seth are. I certainly wouldn’t have been able to guess correctly.

QUESTION: What is the weirdest dream you’ve had lately?