have you ever thought deeply about what you were created for? what if you were just mear steps away from your dream but it is as if you are running on a treadmill and can’t get any closer? you run and run and never get closer. it is frustrating. it is exhausting. and it begins to hurt. true pain. you get pains in your side, your lungs are aching and you’re running out of breath. you’re thirsty. tired. just stopping looks like the most appealing resolution.

how long do you have to keep this momentum? how long until you can leap off the track and give up?

i feel this way right now. like i am running. aching. thirsty. just plain tired. but i have to stay on the track. but for how much longer?

don’t get me wrong – i am happy. truly. for being only 21 i am quite happy with where my treadmill as taken me. to be as young am and to be where i am already is amazing (and quite a blessing), but i know what i am created for. i know with certainty. there is a higher calling on my life that tells me that. what i am running through is not quite it. i am so very close though. i can smell it. it smells sweet.

here’s the reality i’ve come to … i’m just not ready apparently. and the dream is not ready for me. this is something i’ve been running to for a long time. i need to just let it lead me and instead of me trying to push ahead of it. so until then – i keep running. running toward the sweetness. in step with God’s will.